Last night marked the first time I'd gone out in Moncton since New Years Eve.
The lovely Miss Eddie Vee and I attended the Moncton High School production of Nunsense. Eddie ( an art teacher) made the nun puppet, and scored some free tickets to the show, so, we went and had quite a few laughs. It was surprisingly racy and hilarious for a highschool production. I was pleased and impressed. I particularly enjoyed when the chubby lady superior character got high and rolled around on the floor. Good wholesome family entertainment.
Miss Vee's nun puppet.
Moncton High is my old stomping ground...The old woody smell of the ancient auditorium hadn't changed, and stirred memories I'd all but forgotten. The creek of the wooden chairs were the same, and reaching down under the seats, I was happy to find some of them still had the wire hat racks, from when gentlemen still wore hats and stashed them under their seats.
I love these seats. The building was built in the early 1900s, and still has lots of original features. These seats are magic to me...I can't help daydream about the lives of the generations of people who have sat in them...the conversations they've over heard, the heartbreaks and delights they've witnessed.
As always, we were a tad obnoxious and recieved many dirty looks from the conservative Maritimers that filled the other seats. Balls to you, ya darn sticks in the mud!
After the show it was off to my humble abode for a quick wardrobe change before we scurried off to the Paramount Lounge, to see The Mighty, The Katacombs, and the Rockin' Rebels.
As always the Moncton crowd was predictably terrible. Many new faces, but many faces I'd have preffered not to see. Eddie and I occupied the back table and people- watched.
The KatacombsWhile we were dazzled by the overwhelmingly poor accoustics of the Paramount, we couldn't help but notice Mr. Rockabilly Checklist. Now, Moncton doesn't really have a rockabilly scene. 98% of people don't know what Rockabilly is...Eddie Vee and I stick out like sore thumbs...and so did Mr. Rockabilly Checklist (See above photo, he is playing the stand-up bass). He looked very familiar, and blatantly stared at my tits all evening (can't blame him, my cleavage was indeed awe-inspiring). Of course, he was in the next band to play after the Mighty. Once his band took the stage...it was yack yack yack.
Now, one thing I hate, is when you go to see a band, and all they do is bloody talk.
So, like the bitch I am I yell out " LESS TALK, MORE ROCK!!!!!" He is obviously taken a little by surprise, says something about no one ever telling him to shuttup that he likes it... This is not the outcome I wanted. I said less talk, more rock , damnit! So, I pipe up once again " I'LL SAY IT AGAIN! SHUTTUP!"....and the rock finally begins with Miss Vee laughing hysterically and humping me in victory.
After his set, Mr. Rockabilly Checklist makes his way over. My anxiety hits me like a hard-crashing wave, and I feel like I have to vomit. I take a deep breath and prepare my bitch-sheild.
He begins to talk about how much he enjoyed me telling him to shuttup, and just as I'm about to spit out " Allow me to say it again."....
"Do you remember me?" says Mr. Rockabilly Checklist.
Well damnit.
Apparently I know Mr. Rockabilly Checklist.
Only, he wasn't always Mr. Rockabilly Checklist.
He refreshes my memory a bit...and I remember this stand-up bass playing semi-douche used to be an annoying goth kid that would randomly lick people's faces. I remember he once liked my face at a metal show, and I punched him square in the balls. He liked it.
So, Mr.Rockabilly Checklist is also Mr. Once-upon-a-Goth, Face-licker extrodinaire.
Joy of Joys. Goddamnit, Moncton, why do you always throw such odd things my way?
By this point, Eddie Vee is getting increasingly tipsy and wonderfully obnoxious; just how I love her. I'm painfully sober since I was the DD. We deal with various assholes, douchebags and idiots- you know, the typical Moncton show-goer.
By the time the Rockin' Rebels hit the stage, we've had just about enough. We try to enjoy a few of their "new" songs....that sound suspiciously exactly like all their other songs. Sorry boys, you are my friends and all, I appreciate what you're trying to do...but...well...sorry to say you've missed the boat.
The thrasing and spazzing drunk girl to my left, who was whipping me with her goddamed hair had earned herself some of my famous death-glares. Her friend across the bar notices, rushes over, taps her friend on the shoulder, points in my direction and pulls her away. Apparently I'm scary. Miss Vee announces that once her drink is finished, we can hit the pavement. This fills me with joy. After a few more douche-encounters, we are safetly high-tailing it home.
Goodnight, Moncton. You haven't changed a bit, and I won't miss you at all while I'm in Vegas.
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