Project Urban Garden/ Urban Tiki Oasis progress.

Hello  my happy little spring-time bunnies!

Project Urban Garden/ Tiki Oasis continues at the Le Noire residence. Slowly but surely we've been building up our collection of veggie and fruit plants, and decorating here and there.

Last week, craving more privacy, I decided to improvise a system for removable curtains at the entrance / staircase to our patio.

 I used twine and zip ties to attach some 2-foot bamboo poles to the deck, drilled in some screw hoops at the top, where I could hang a curtain rod. I wanted a system where I could easily remove the curtains and take them inside- so I used extra thick gauged jewelry wire as a curtain rod to hang from the loops. Upon finding out the hooks I bought were too big for the loops...I improvised some more, and used clip-on earing parts. It's like Swiss Family Robinson over here- everything is improvised and re-purposed!

The curtains allow for a bit more privacy from our neighbors to the right- and my galpal Kaycie and I took full advantage last Sunday . We pulled out some pillows and blankets and made a big loungey bed to bask in the sun, read, drink mojitos and girl-talk. The hustle and bustle of downtown seemed miles away. It was lovely!

Today is rainy and grey, but I've been poking around outside regardless. I needed the cheering up, since our town is currently a-blaze with scandal. A local university who has in place blatantly discriminatory anti-homosexual rules is receiving public funding. Over $150,000 a year of PUBLIC money. My heart is broken that my city is supporting these bigots. You can read more about it HERE.  I am a the media coordinator of our local LGBT non-profit, so I've been flamed with endless requests for interviews, comments, etc. Public response has been mostly to cut the funding, but a few people I once respected have turned out to be homophobic wankers, so my heart is a bit broken. To cheer myself up today, I picked up some trellaces, climbing ivy, and a few more seedlings .

The green beans and sweet snap peas are highly boobytrapped with bamboo skewers to keep out a pesky, fat , clever little squirrel. So far, no more furry bastard .

The Ivy will hopefully climb up this trelace for extra privacy.

The climbing spinach is growing wonderfully. It is edible and decorative. Very excited to see how it turns out.

More green beans, herbs, and tomato plants. Bush bean seedlings are staying warm n toasty under the mini pop-up greenhouse.

Our tacky pink plastic flamingos continue to be a great pigeon-repellent. You can see our one and only sky-scrapper in in the background, blurry, behind my neighbor's roof.

All in all, I'm very happy with the progress. The trees in our back yard are almost full-bloom with leaves now, the chickadees and finches are all having babies , and the caterpillars are at a minimum this year. We are wonderfully blessed to have such a cozy and lush little oasis right in the heart of downtown, and we plan on taking full advantage and enjoying it as much as possible!

How are your gardens growing?

xoxo
Lenora

Our little urban garden

Hello my darling bunnies!

Nick and I have decided this year to try and take advantage of our outdoor space, and we've started an urban patio garden! We live smack-dab downtown, and are very lucky not  only to have a patio, but one large enough, with enough sunlight to be able to have plants. 

We started modestly, with a few containers of radish, kale and peppers. This is my 1st attempt at gardening, and as my experience has grown, so has our garden. 

These 1st few pictures are from May 1st. I improvised a cheap solution for more privacy by stapling up some bamboo mats. 

I've been doing my morning yoga and enjoying my morning tea out on the deck when the weather permits- it has been lovely!

These photos are from today. As you can see I've pretty much tripled our plants, and everything is growing amazingly! I just planted a whole second set of radish,green bean, and kale.  I started everything from seeds (except the dill , cilantro and mint, which I purchased as young seedlings) 

Our garden currently contains:

-kale (in the large black tubs)

-three kinds of tomatoes (also in the big black tubs)

-lots and lots of bush beans and sweet snap peas

-three kinds of mint, oregano, dill, cilantro.

-a dozen or more jalapeno and cayenne pepper plants

-green pepper

-climbing spinach

-green onion

-radish

-raspberry

-strawberry 

I'm really proud of the progress so far! Not bad for a 1st timer without a yard, I have to say! The biggest challenge so far has been keeping out a particularly clever and fat squirrel. Those downtown squirrels are damn smart, not even cayenne pepper sprinkled about has been deterring him.  


You'll also notice my big tacky pink flamingos- not only do I love them for the kitsch factor , they've been keeping away the pigeons! 



I also have been bringing the babies outside in their travel cage, to enjoy the sun. They've been making friends with the chickadees and yellow finches who visit our feeders


Is anyone else planting a garden this year? 



xo
Lenora

30 before 30

Hello bunnies!

Lately,I've been seeing quite a few " 30 before 30" lists pop up all over the internet, and you know, they are a pretty good idea. I've decided to jump on the bandwagon.

I'm 26, turning 27 in August, so the clock is ticking. Here we go!

1-Sunbathe totally nude ( as opposed to just topless as I've been doing)
2-Get published (Be it a book, a regular article in a newspaper or magazine, etc)
3-Volunteer more (preferably with LGBTQ youth)
4-Double my under-the-needle time in terms of tattoos (Currently at 42 hours. I'd like some sexy thigh tattoos next!)
5-Conquer my fear of medical needles and medical procedures, so I can get tests/ etc done without panic attacks
6-Travel more- especially overseas. Particularly, Spain , Italy and France
7-Learn to make french macarons
8-Sing in front of a crowd in a non-drunken-karaoke fashion
9-Learn to play the ukulele
10-Perform more burlesque
11-Hone my sewing skills, and design some dresses instead of just altering existing ones.
12-Read more books
13-Do more yoga
14-Grow and can my own food ( working on that one right now!)
15-Give more talks on body-positivity, self-confidence, etc .
16-Host more diner parties
17-Get a bike, and effin' use it.
18-Attend more music festivals ( Red Hot n Blue, HotRod Hootenanny, etc)
19- Learn to drive a classic car ( pre 1960s Chevy, Ford or Caddy!)
20-Learn to knit
21-Help my partner get an education, be it with taking on another job to support us both for awhile, or moving somewhere school is better/more affordable. Possibly Montreal.
22-Practice/ Use my French more- I was raised bilingual but I'm very self conscious of my French. Gotta use it, or I'll loose it.
23-Visit family in other parts of the world.
24-Donate more to deserving charities
25-Camp out in the desert (preferably in Arizona.) Drive Route 66!
26-Visit California to see Mel, visit the Museum of Death, and experience Santa Monica and LA
27-Continue to conquer my anxiety, and enjoy my first winter without crippling depression and hermit-dom
28-Hopefully grow some more damn natural eyebrow (after an unfortunate waxing incident when I was 19, I have very little natural eyebrow, hence them being drawn on.)
29-Get more birdies, preferably a conure!
30-Turn 30 gracefully and un-ashamed. Life will not end for me at 30 as I've always stressed about.. Growing older will not make me less of a woman. Wrinkles will not make me less attractive. I will embrace the wisdom and knowledge I will accumulate, and enjoy every minute.


How about you guys? What are some things you young folks would like to do before you're 30? Hell, how about 40 before you're 40? 50 before you're 50? Write a post, share the link, I'd love to know!!

Xo Lenora

Self portrait- April 26th.- Embracing a more natural me

Lately, ever since I’ve come back from Cuba, I’ve been sporting a much more natural look. This is my natural hair, air -dried outside in the sun. Bare skin, nothing but eyebrows. A few months ago, I would have never posted this photo… but I’m so much more comfortable in my own skin lately. 

I joke that I’m turning into a hippie, but, embracing my natural beauty on my own terms has been really freeing. Don’t get me wrong, I still love being a glamour-puss, and getting all dolled up for a night on the town- but the difference is, I don’t feel like I have to put on that “show” every day, anymore, and that has been such a great thing to feel and discover.

My look has always defined me, and as I grow, I’m much more comfortable expressing all sides of me to the world, and lately, that is a much more toned-down Lenora. 

On a side note, I owe this awesome mane of mermaid hair to shampooing rarely (1-2 times a week), and using THIS stuff. 

xo

Lenora

My Big, Fat, Cuban Vacation- Final Day, Final reflection.

My apologies for the delay in writing the final entry in this series. I've been so busy!  Here is the last entry in my journal from my trip.

April 7th,


3pm

"Sitting at the lobby bar, with a final mojito by my side. I've checked out, stashed my bags, and plan to enjoy the next few hours until I board the bus to the airport. 


All in all, I am happy with this trip. I am proud of myself for doing this alone,  fighting to stay positive, and pushing myself out of my comfort zone. I had no idea I had so much to learn and overcome, and every single day was a complete blessing. 


My mind wanders back to the beautiful water out on the boat yesterday, and how wonderfully calm and happy I felt. I will always hold those memories close, and draw on them when I need to be reminded of just how magical life can be. 


At some point today, I plan to re-read all of what I have written this week. This is something I've always struggled with, re-reading any journals. I think I am finally in a place of strength and comfort to be able to properly self-reflect without fear or shame. In all my years of writing and recording my thoughts, I've always struggled with the idea of re-visiting my thoughts. I never have the strength to re-immerse myself in whatever emotions I had expressed, out of fear, maybe, of feeling those feelings all over again. I cannot go through life trying to avoid suffering. Suffering is a natural and needed part of life. Living without suffering isn't truly existing, and I've learned, this week, just how much I have been holding back from living my damn life. I have to let go of fear. 


I now begin to wonder how to change my life for the better when I return home. Small steps, of course. Continue on a healthy mental path by allowing less negativity into my life, and continuing with my healthy eating habits.  I am so invested in the idea of a total life over-haul , down to breathing new life and love into my relationship with Nick, to spending more time with friends and those I care about. As I said when I first touched my pen to this journal, I know I'm going to fly back home a new woman."

After a rollercoaster of a week, I was happy to be heading home. My heart and soul felt satiated. The trip home was pleasant, despite a cancelled flight due to a snow storm- but this allowed me to stay at a lovely hotel in Toronto, and continue to enjoy my triumph of eating alone without anxiety. Such a silly , small thing to mention, but the next morning in Toronto, I woke up to have breakfast in the restaurant across the street, and I didn't bring any distractions with me what so ever. No phone, no book... I enjoyed my meal and all the goings-on around me. Small victories!

When I booked this trip, I knew I needed to throw myself into the fire, and experience something raw. I had no idea what I would learn and experience. As I write this now, from bed , on a rainy evening...I almost cannot believe that I experienced such a true adventure.

I truly feel reborn, and have taken my life by the balls. I have been on the constant go since I came home- getting out of the house, trying new things, making new friends, accepting new challenges; it is pure bliss. Friends and loved ones have commented on a certain "glow" I seem to be radiating - and I tell them : " It is happiness. It is freedom".

We are currently planting an urban garden on our back patio. Kale, tomatoes, peppers, radish, strawberry, raspberry, green beans, snap peas, spinach...all started from seeds, and already sprouting wonderfully. I am slowly transforming the patio into an urban oasis; a safe space for me to sit, read, and enjoy the life growing all around me. After  a week confessing my sins and fears to the ocean- I feel so much more connected to nature and the Universe. I cannot quite describe the feeling. I am turning that new connection into a hobby. Seeing life grow all around me, and tending and caring for it as it slowly grows from the ground has been really profound.

Just minutes before I sat down to write this final entry- I was packing my suitcase yet again. In one week's time, I will be hoping another plane, back to Cuba. This time, to Santa Clara, and this time, with my wonderful partner, Nick, by my side. We found an amazing deal,  Nick had vacation time to use up, and I wanted to go on another adventure and hopefully discover new things, this time with my boyfriend. We didn't think twice about booking. I have given Nick The Art of Happiness to read on the trip- I want us to be on the same page. I want him to get a taste of the freedom I achieved just a few short weeks ago.

Sure, maybe taking a 3rd  trip in just a few months may seem lavish or irresponsible, but we are both at a time in our lives where we can afford both financially and time-wise, to take these trips. Who knows when we will have these opportunities again, so we are truly living in the moment.

Without drawing this entry out too long , in summary...I very much feel like  the woman writing these words to you today is an entirely happier, healthier, rejuvenated, human...I am humbled and grateful for the experience and all that I learned, and I feel SO EXCITED to be living my life in new ways. Every day is such a blessing, and I'm so ecstatic to finally realize this.

I want to thank all of you who've been reading along, and all those who've reached out with your emails, messages, and phone calls. The response has been unbelievable. To those who've said I've inspired you to take new steps- you have no idea how unbelievably touched I am that I could make any difference , even a tiny one, in your life or outlook. Thank you all, from the very bottom of my heart.

Here's to a new adventure, each and every day.

Xoxo Lenora

My Big , Fat, Cuban Vacation- Round 2- April 6th- a Day at SEA for Lenora!

April 6th-

This day was by far the most memorable, and a highlight of my trip. Leslie and Terry, the vivacious and kind friends I made from the UK, invited me for a day-long fishing trip out to sea.

They've visited Cayo Guillermo yearly for nearly a decade, and have made some wonderful local friends, who are fishermen. This translated into the opportunity to experience a bit of the real Cuba you miss out on when staying at resorts. I was in for a real treat!

We boarded La Perla bright and early, armed with generous amounts of rum, beer, and an arm full of food we grabbed from the breakfast buffet.

I met Tom and Michael- Leslie and Terry's long time friends. Also on board was the captain, Juan Carlo, and his wife. I felt immediately comfortable- Tom and Michael were warm and personable, and were genuinely excited to be spending the day with us.

We pulled anchor and set out on the crystal water. The color was breathtaking.

A mile or two out, we dropped anchor, and Juan Carlo hopped down and jumped into some snorkeling gear, and without any explanation, dove into the water.

He was diving for lobster- to use as bait!

Once we were stocked with bait, we pulled anchor, cruised out a few more miles- and broke out the fishing gear.

Tom patiently showed me the ropes, and my line was cast. Before I knew it, within a minute,I had the first bite of the day!

And they just kept coming! I caught fish after fish, much to the surprise of the men. Leslie laughed heartily, and exclaimed " Show them how to do it, baby" in her thick accent.

Lunch time was approaching, and Juan Carlo and Micheal began to heatedly discuss which of the fish I'd caught they thought I would prefer to eat first. These are some of my favorite photos from my trip- they capture a candid and passionate moment, perfectly!

"You caught good fish!" Exclaims Juan Carlo.

Michael scurried down to the kitchen to get to cooking, while we continued to fish.

Just look at how blue and crystal-clear the water is , and how many little fishies you can see!

Before we knew it, lunch was served! Michael did an amazing job cooking up our catch- it was delicious! There is something very primal and satisfying about catching your own food.

d.

Our lunch view was really something- we'd dropped anchor next to a small uninhabited island called Bird Island.

As many of you know- I ADORE birds, so this was a dream come true for me. With our bellies full, we hopped off the back of the boat into the warm water, and swam up to our own deserted, tropical, paradise.

Terry took the lead and was already off exploring the island before us ladies had even stepped off the boat. King of the castle!

I wish I could have brought my camera to the island to document all the birds and flora on the island- but trust me when I say I was moved to tears. While we sunbathed on the white sand, and swam around in the deep water, Michael, Tom and Juan Carlo snorkeled for more lobster, and these curious creatures. Some form of conch -like mollusks that Michael insisted were delicious!

We spent a few hours anchored at Bird Island, soaking in the beauty. Soon, we began the cruise back to shore.

There was a very distinct vibe on the boat at this time. We all collectively experienced something tremendously beautiful and special, and we were able to acknowledge it without words. We were silent, and gazed out at the water. My eyes let go of a few happy tears, and Leslie nodded. I wondered to myself if she knew just how important and meaningful the day had been for me.

I thanked Michael, Tom, and Juan Carlo for everything. We hugged and I felt truly connected to them all. Michael touched my cheek and told me I was a natural born fisherman, and to come back soon, to catch him more fish. Leslie, Terry and I made plans to meet up for a late supper as I disembarked the boat, and I hurried down the dock to the shore.

I floated back to my room in a daze of absolute happiness and gratitude. I turned on the shower to wash away the salt and sand- and I cried. I cried passionate, happy tears. I'm crying the same tears now as I write this.

I sat on my balcony to dry my hair, and took to my journal...

6:50pm

"Today on the boat? There are no words. Catching fish, enjoying everyone's company ,swimming on a deserted beach? Heaven on earth. Terry and Leslie are two of the kindest souls I've ever met and I am so thankful to have them in my life to share this journey with me. Ill never forget today. The locals working on the boat, Michael, Tom and Juan Carlo? So friendly , warm and polite. I think today may have been one of the best times in my life. I close my eyes and immediately think of the beautiful crystal water and the hundreds of fish darting around . As I cast my first line, I asked the Universe for permission to take some of her creatures, and I immediately got a bite. I felt so , completely, connected."

Terry , Leslie and I enjoyed a delicious dinner, with lots of white wine and laughter. I thanked them from the bottom of my heart for the day, and for their company. I really wanted them to know just how special the experience was for me. After several more glasses of wine, we decided to call it a day, and get some much needed rest, and agreed to meet early in the morning for a final meal together before I had to fly home.

10pm-

"As I lay my head down, my heart and soul are full and happy. This week has been a blessing. I've learned an incredible amount about myself and the Universe - I am so overwhelmingly grateful. Tomorrow during my long trip journey home, I will be writing more extensively about everything. For now, I sleep. 

Life is beautiful."

Tomorrow will be my final entry in my vacation series.

 Until then,

 xoxo 

Lenora 

My Big , Fat, Cuban Vacation- Round 2- April 5th- Encounters with the Cuban Male Ego ,and dealing with negativity in new ways.

April 5th

"Nursing yet another mighty hangover, on the beach. Thank goodness for the cleansing powers of the sea. Last night I drank into the early morning hours with my new British friends. What a blessing they are. They invited me out fishing on Friday! Normally I would hesitate since it is a new situation and I don't know the parameters ,but I graciously accepted, and look forward to the adventure!"

What is a vacation without a little adventure? I made the right decision in accepting the invitation, as you will see in tomorrow's entry.

11am-

"This morning on TV in the lobby, I heard something powerful:

"The greatest journeys give you answers to questions you didn't even plan to ask."

That thought has stuck with me, hard. How true it is! I am so grateful and proud I took this trip- I have learned so much. I *have* been given answers to questions I hadn't even thought to ask. What a powerful statement...."

Most of the day on the 5th I floated around in the ocean, splashed around in the pool, chatted with people, and best yet- I didn't write or pick up my phone once during breakfast or lunch! I was feeling on top of the world.

Dinner time, however...would prove difficult for a whole different reason. To give you a little back story- last time I went to Cuba in January, I made friends with the hotel porter, "C" (I'm choosing to not share his full name out of respect of privacy). We kept in touch via email and texts, and made sure everything was set for my return trip. He was concerned I was travelling solo, and vowed to watch out for me. He was always the perfect gentleman, was very polite, and never crossed any lines. He never flirted, and would always shoo away flirty hotel workers if he noticed they were getting too forward. I was very grateful for his friendship, and on the 5th, I invited him out to dinner as a thank you. It turns out I was about to get more than I bargained for.

We went to a beautiful little restaurant on the beach, where they cook fresh-caught lobster on an open fire. It was delicious!

We talked about philosophy, our lives, my relationship with Nick and our future plans together...it was lovely! C was polite and everything was totally platonic. After dinner, we went for a walk on the beach, and a whole other side of him reared it's ugly head.

As I was dipping my toes into the water,he grabbed me and tried to kiss me. His fingers dug into my arms , hard. When I pushed him away, he got very angry. He began to yell. My heart began to race. He screamed at me " I've wasted so much time on you! Typing to you, texting you, making sure everything was good for your vacation,and you won't even touch me? I wasted SO MUCH TIME!" He started yelling at me in Spanish, and my eyes darted frantically around the beach for other people. My eyes met those of a concerned man walking with his children.

C's words really stung, and I began to yell right back. I told him I owed him nothing, I had a boyfriend, and if he thought I wasted his time, then not to allow me to waste anymore- and I began to storm off. He grabbed my arm and pulled me back, nearly causing me to lose my balance. I slapped him hard across the face. I told him to never speak to me again. He fell to his knees trying to apologize, and I turned and left. People around us were staring, and a woman approached me to ask if I was okay.

As I walked , fast and angry, down the beach, back to my room...heavy clouds were forming above. Just as I was reaching my room, lightening lit up the sky. I threw my arms up in the air and yelled " EXACTLY!" As I slipped my key card into the door, heavy rain began to fall. The universe was feeling exactly what I was feeling... I flung myself on my bed with my journal, and began to write feverishly.....

"Turns out C is an asshole...(insert a page of rambling about the already-explained situation).

He wasted his time?!? What a horrible thing to say to someone. He was so happy to see me when I arrived- it was genuine. He was probably just hurt that I turned him down. Maybe he was trying to be macho about it? It still hurts just the same...

I'm trying to be compassionate about it- he does live a hard life here, and did go out of his way to make me feel comfortable and safe. But, sex as a thank you? I don't think so.

This is another test. I'm mad, and hurt, but I'm going to try and utilize some of the things I've learned while here. Relax. Be compassionate, and let the water flow under the bridge. Normally I'd be a hot mess at a time like this . I'm surprisingly calm.

Yes, C is probably upset over the rejection, but he shouldn't have acted that way. He acted childish. As much as I dislike when people don't like me, I'm going to fight like hell to keep calm, and let this roll off my back. I will chalk this up to an unfortunate circumstance, but a learning experience none the less.

There. Having written a bit, I am completely calmed down, and ready to go spend some time with Terry and Leslie in the bar. How wonderful it is to have a better grasp on my emotions and anxiety!"

I couldn't believe how easy it was to calm myself down, and how unaffected I was in just a few minutes. Normally, I'd let a negative situation like that affect me deeply, dwell in it, take it far too personally...but being able to turn it around and see where C was probably coming from? It made it entirely easier. Later that evening when I was in the lobby, I saw C at the reception desk, his pant legs still sandy from when he threw himself to his knees. I felt no ill-will, no hatred...I just felt a bit sad for him.

I am incredibly proud of my progress into a happier, more positive, person.

I spent the early evening in the lobby bar with Leslie and Terry, as the house band went table to table , performing . The lobby has open-air sections, and the heavy rain flowed into the fountains and off of the roof. The sound of the rain added something magical to the music being played.

Tomorrow's entry will be beautiful. The highlight of my trip- my day out at sea, fishing! Stay tuned!

XO

Lenora